Friday, October 05, 2007

Clearing Out The Cobwebs

The last six months really kicked my butt. Prior to the loss of my father, there were several other situations that were slowly sucking bits of joy out of my life, and then--well. The summer was awful. Now I mostly feel tired and scattered and overwhelmed, and while I am currently managing to keep track of the kids' activities and the laundry and the grocery shopping and oh, right, going back to work after nine weeks off, I certainly don't have much energy to spare. (And I certainly have not been keeping on top of the housekeeping.) I juggle and I juggle and I keep waiting for the balls to drop.

But. Small steps bring me forward. I laugh with my kids. I make time for a date with my husband, for an evening of knitting with a good friend. I try to keep things in perspective. I breathe deeply and try to stay in the moment. I do not feel hopeless. I try not to feel guilty about the cards I have not written, the thank yous I have not said, the good things I meant to do but didn't. I will get there, eventually.

Overall, my life is good. I just have to get back to living it.